Posts filed under 'Children's Tea Party'
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This guest post features Donna Collins. She has been planning special events for over 20 years. Her children’s party planning business, Party Wishes, is located in Santa Clarita, CA. Check out her website at www.partywishesscv.com.
Being a children’s party planner, I have the pleasure of introducing children to the wonderful ceremony of having tea. Of course, a child’s tea party is slightly modified from an adult tea party but the elements are basically the same. Whether I’m hosting a party for 2 or 20, there are some simple rules I like to follow.
First the decorations must be festive and capture the imagination. For example, when I host my Mary Poppins Tea Party, I include decor to reflect that of the theme. I have Edwardian inspired china and serving pieces. I have a giant penguin holding a tray of goodies and framed pictures of Mary and Bert on the table. The girls wear Mary Poppins inspired hats with cherries and daisies on them and wear white gloves.
When my daughter and I have a Fairy Tea Party, it is outside under a tree. I attach a pink netted canopy from a branch and spread a blanket out for us to sit on. Don’t be afraid to use your “good china”. It teaches the children to appreciate it and you will be surprised how gently they treat it once you explain the importance of it. My daughter has been sipping out of 100 year old china tea cups since she was 3 years old.
Next, the food should be small and fun to look at. Sandwiches are much more fun to eat when they are shaped like flowers and have a maraschino cherry half as it’s center. Pretzels and marshmallows dipped in chocolate and sprinkles are fun and easy. Chocolate cupcakes frosted red with white chocolate chips (tips pressed in first) look like magical mushrooms! Anything you can put sprinkles, colored sugar, make into different shapes or make a different color usually makes wonderful children tea food. Even scones dusted with colored sugar before baking can become child-like. Some fun cookbooks to reference are the Pink Princess Cookbook and Fairies Cookbook. You can try to introduce real tea to children but I found it is easier to start them off with lemonade. My kids favorite is Raspberry Lemonade.
Of course, the constant in all tea parties is manners. When I host a party for children, I always go over the “rules” of the table. The first item I go over is the magic words- please and thank you. Napkin on your lap and NO slurping! When food is offered and they don’t want one, I tell them it is polite to say “No thank you. I don’t care for any”, not “I don’t like it.” And if they touch-y, they take-y . Look first and then pick up what you want. Only take one of each item, never more than you can eat. That is even difficult for adults when everything looks so yummy! I always have them asked to be excused to leave the table for any reason. It’s amazing how well behaved the children will act when at a tea table and they know what is expected of them.
Although it is not required at adult tea parties, I always like to have an activity for the kids. My daughter and I go on a walk around the neighborhood and collect items to build a fairy house. We then come home and build it together. It’s wonderful to see her little imagination at work and deciding if a certain rock will make a good table or a chair. After the construction is done, we then have our well deserved tea. Just last night, my husband and I introduced our children to the game of croquet. My daughter immediately planned a weekend croquet tournament with a tea party. What a fabulous idea!
Tea Party Girl’s note: Which of Donna’s ideas do you like the best? There are some terrific ones here! Leave a comment and let us know.
May 23rd, 2008
Can the elegance of the tea party mix with rural horses? It isn’t easy, but it can be done! I experienced it in action last Saturday at a birthday party for a friend of my daughter’s. With guidance straight from Let’s Have a Tea Party!: Special Celebrations for Little Girls (pictured above) anyone can combine two of little girl’s favorite loves: the teapot and the horse.
Not every horse tea party can start as this one did, with pony rides. But if you can pull it off, the girls will never forget it.
Even if you can’t offer real horses, most young girls own a horse or two you can use for decorations. Check out the simple centerpiece setup for this horse-themed tea table set up under a canopy outside.
The mother used blue ribbons for simple napkin rings. She served three different kind of tea sandwiches cut with a horse-head shaped cookie cutter, spinach pinwheels, and the highlight: chocolate-dipped strawberries.
And what girl can resist a pink teapot-shaped cake covered in Skittles? Notice the teapot lid, a simple round lollipop stuck in the top.
My daughter called it one of the best days of her life. I wish I had taken a picture of the darling favor bags the mom put together. She folded the top of simple paper bags and stapled them like the top of a teabag, complete with attached yarn and small paper square like the tabs on teabags. Darling! And the birthday girl loved hosting her guests, telling them to pick out their teacups and pouring the “tea” for them.
There’s only one thing I would have done differently, besides serve real tea, and that is to plan a short etiquette lesson. As the only adult around at the time when the girls sat down, I was slightly taken aback (though not terribly surprised) when one girl began to lead the others in a burping contest. What did surprise me was that when I immediately stepped in with some gentle correction and guidance, they didn’t all respond very quickly. As a homeschooling mom, I still believe young children (I don’t think any of the girls were over eight) expect adults to guide them. And I hate to think, truly, that any young girl may already be ruined for graciousness and gentility in certain situations.
Teach your children well, dear readers. Don’t assume they know how to act. The window of opportunity is often smaller than we think.
May 2nd, 2008
Not only can we credit Victorian England for the popularization of afternoon tea, but also for the practice of exchanging elaborate valentines. Did you know this? Doilies, rosy-cheeked cupids, and embellishments added to love letters began during the “Golden Age of Valentines” of 1840-1860. I understand that it was a subtle way for men and women to communicate their real feelings to each other. Don’t you remember looking hard between the lines for a hidden meaning in the Valentine you received in the third grade from the boy you had a crush on? And oh, the first REAL store-bought glossy and sappy Valentine I received in the eighth grade? I’ll never forget it. I’m sure I still have it around somewhere!The expectations get so much higher as we get older, regrettably so. Can’t Valentine’s Day still be about innocence? If you are no longer looking for hidden meanings in punch-out cards or expecting a glossy Hallmark card, may I suggest reclaiming the holiday for children? How can you bring the beauty and fun of the holiday to the children in your life? One way is through a Valentine-themed tea party.
For specific directions on planning your party guest list and invitations, be sure to see my other winter party planning guide. This one will focus specifically on incorporating the Valentine theme.
I can’t take all the credit for the following suggestions. As I opened one of my favorite party-planning books, Sarah Ban Breathnach’s Mrs. Sharp’s Traditions: Reviving Victorian Family Celebrations Of Comfort & Joy, I saw my idea was hardly original. She suggests hosting a Cupid’s Tea the weekend before February 14 to allow children to create homemade valentines. Wouldn’t this be a lovely event for pairs of mothers and daughters, or aunts and nieces? Use this opportunity to celebrate with the ones you share comfort with and try to include children no matter what your season of life. Now know this, I’m not an advocate of encouraging childhood romances. My six-year old made valentines this weekend for her brothers, father, and grandfathers (as well as the women in her life). Encouraging children in creating beauty to share with others in thoughtfulness is the goal.
Mrs. Sharp recommends assembling all your materials. It’s amazing the beautiful Victorian art one kind find these days on a simple sticker. This book of Old-Time Valentine Stickers
only costs $1.50. Such an easy way to add Victorian art to the valentines! Here are a few other sources for simple, vintage, Victorian valentines.
Vintage Valentines Press-Out Book
Valentine Postcards
24 Full-Color Ready-to-Mail Valentine Cards from the Collections of Henry Ford Museum & Greenfield Village
What other supplies and embellishments would you need for assembling your own valentines? The complete list is available in Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book I mentioned above. In fairness of copyright, I will not list it here. I will, however, point out that she recommends taking time to make a post office box for the valentines, another memory of childhood I think would be great fun to recreate. Don’t you?
Menu
When planning your Valentine party tea menu, think red, pink, white, and heart-shaped. Some very simple ways to include these items are with:
heart-shaped cookie cutters and cinnamon toast (another childhood favorite) or other open-faced sandwiches.
strawberry muffins (barely in season, so look for frozen strawberries).
heart-shaped scones (cut with cookie cutter like you would biscuits).
a heart-shaped cake frosted pink.
candy cups with foil-wrapped chocolates, conversation hearts and/or cinnamon candies.
For a more formal, adult-themed tea you can garnish savory sandwiches or soups by cutting out a small nickel-sized heart in the middle of a (clean) piece of paper and using it as a stencil to shake paprika into a heart shape. It’s the little touches that will wow your guests.
Decorating
Large doilies can be used as place-mats. Always an advocate of using real china and linen as the ideal, even for a children’s tea party, I often choose this holiday to compromise. It’s so fun to decorate in red, pink, and white that even paper napkins will do. And it can be fun to find heart-patterned mugs, possibly inexpensively at the dollar store. I do still encourage you to use real plates and cups. Paper cups tip so easily. Let the food show off the theme instead of the plates and look for white or glass. And paper tablecloths seem pointless to me. Try to use the real thing.
For flowers, roses can be silly expensive this time of year, but tulips often show up right about this time in the grocery store. Carnations, though not the most elegant flower, can be inexpensive and available in every color. When children are involved in a tea party, I always use some fun but classical music like Peter and the Wolf or excerpts from Mozart’s Magic Flute. Children make enough of their own noise without added piped-in music! And classical music literally calms our nervous systems down.
What would you add to a child’s Valentine-themed tea party? I’d love to hear some of yours!
January 28th, 2008
Today my son’s grammar lesson involved handwriting a snail-mail letter. As we went over the process, I showed him how to address the letter he had chosen to write to his grandparents (Mr. and Mrs. Male-Name Evans). Now, my mother is not the least offended being called Mrs. Husband’s Name. But plenty of my college friends would be. And I couldn’t help thinking, am I teaching my son something that is obsolete?
What role do manners and etiquette play in the twenty-first century? Tea Party Girl wants to go on record as saying they play the same role they always did: to help us show preference and honor to others over ourselves. Good manners will never be obsolete and it is correct, for example, for my son to address his grandparents a way they are comfortable. “Hey, Pops!” does not work, on an envelope or to their face.
I’m always a little amused how many adults I have tea with who feel uneasy about their manners and make a comment about it. Teatime is not meant to be stiff and awkward, but somehow adults know it’s not a time to let it all hang out, either. So they worry about the minor things like whether they’re supposed to stick out their pinkie (you’re not! Unless your goal is to make fun of tea drinkers). But they’ll take a cell phone call during the tea or place their purse (that’s just been on the car floor) on the table and not think anything of it.
Do your children a favor, learn basic meal etiquette, and then teach it to them in the evening at the dining room table. A children’s tea party is an excellent, fun way to teach etiquette as well. But children need some of the basics reinforced over and over and over again (unless your children are different from mine in this regard).
So here’s some basic fundamentals of mealtime etiquette, modified from Emily Post’s The Guide to Good Manners for Kids. As a mother and Tea Party Girl, I’ve chosen the top seven I wish every parent taught their child.
- Arrive at the table with clean hands and face. I admit, I did not do this every time when my children were very little. Now I regret it because I have to remind them all the time. It’s not a habit. Do you have the habit of washing your hands before you sit down to eat? Do your children?
- Start eating when the host begins, or when everyone else does. Even in your own home. It breaks my heart to see hard-working mothers serving their families only for the other members to chow down before she can even sit down. She deserves her work to be respected by waiting.
- Don’t criticize the food. Oh, that my children would never do this when at other people’s home. I can’t stand it when other children do it to me. Serving a meal is a labor of love and the one receiving it should never criticize it. My children are not allowed to say, “I don’t like…”
- Talk with everyone at the table. We don’t live in a society anymore where children are seen but not heard. I don’t think, however, that they should be allowed to talk on and on with their brother about the latest video game, either. I am trying to teach my children to ask questions of others and listen to one another. I do this because as an adult, I have sat by many a dominating or exclusive conversationalist.
- Thank the person who prepared the meal. I have served countless, thankless meals in my home to other people’s children and my own. This is another manner I wish I had enforced more consistently when they were really little because they constantly forget. It means a great deal to me as a host when another child thanks me for serving them food.
Anybody have an etiquette lesson they’d like to add to the list? Please leave a comment below.
January 11th, 2008
Or, here’s an even better title.
“Why I took a twelve-year old boy to The Nutcracker, but told the six-year old girl she couldn’t be in it.“
My six-year old danced in the womb. I’m not exaggerating. She skips and sings through life. And this is her first year officially taking dance. What a thrill when her class was asked to be the Bon-Bons in the local ballet production of The Nutcracker! She pranced home to give me the release form I needed to sign for her to participate. What mother would deny her only dancing daughter the chance to dress-up around all the ballerinas and participate in a live show during the most wonderful time of the year? Yep. That would be me.
She was the only child in her class that didn’t participate. For weeks she attended class where they practiced. She even got to go under the big skirt and learn the part. But don’t worry. I feel very sure she will not end up scarred emotionally or in need of therapy.
Because if we’d run around on the studio’s rehearsal schedule this time of year, with me needing to figure out costuming and stay backstage with her for hours on end for her to perform for 5 minutes three times in one weekend, I would be scarred emotionally and in need of therapy. And by the third child, I know there will be other opportunities, that if she’s really meant to dance, she will, etc., etc., etc.
But that’s only part of the picture. In my opinion, ballet is like tea. There’s a lot of mediocre and sometimes lousy product floating around. And because of that, it doesn’t receive the respect it deserves. You see, I’m all for exposing children to art. And I do think a neighborhood or school production works now and again. Too much lousy classical art though, and like tea people think that’s what the product is! If I’m going to make my children sit through a ballet, (or Shakespeare, which I’ve done as well) I want their exposure to be the best I can provide.
So our family said no to the local production of The Nutcracker this year, even though our daughter could have been in it. And today, despite our recent crazy schedule, we piled in the car at 8am (the crack-of-dawn for homeschooling families) with another family and headed down the hill to the big city version. They didn’t disappoint. The costumes and sets were professional and filled with color. The big city orchestra handled Tchaikovsky well with energetic pace. And with a large enough talent pool to draw on, everyone from the Sugar Plum Fairy to the Bon-Bons were on-pointe. With binoculars in hand from our seats in the Grand Tier, even my 9- and 12-year old boys enjoyed the performance.
I wish I’d had the funds to continue the experience down the street at Earl Grey Manor Tea Salon, with a little raspberry jam in our tea to honor the Russian composer. Earl Grey offers a Silk Road Tea Tasting which includes tea and food pairings from China, the Middle East, Russia, and South Africa, complete with a Samovar Tent, Gongfu Table and other appropriate settings. If you’re ever in the Sacramento area, you must be sure to stop by. But alas, this mother had shot her culture budget on the ballet and the students had minded their manners enough for one day. So, off to IN-N-OUT Burger we went instead. Maybe next time.
December 12th, 2007
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