Posts filed under 'The Tea Table'
Or are you at ease with human-made items of beauty?
I recently heard a story about a woman with her future groom registering for their wedding. They exclaimed over the price of a stainless steel flatware place setting to the salesperson.
“Forty-four dollars? How many people can eat with this setting?”
“One.”
“One!?” And they walked away shaking their heads.
Now, I am sure there were a number of facets involved in their decision. And my point in telling this story is not to debate purchasing items for your tabletop when world hunger is not yet solved or child labor is used for imported American goods. I also know a home is not built on what one possesses. But I tell the story because my heart was saddened that they held no vision for the value of gathering beautiful items. After all, why purchase less of quality (or ask your friends to) when one can buy enough to overfill the silverware drawer for the same price?
Why indeed? Here are four reasons Tea Party Girl suggests choosing quality over quantity when it comes to gathering items for dressing your table:
- Price is often connected to artistry. Who made the item? Is it stamped “Made in China” or from a company steeped in tradition and family history of artistry? I suggest it is worth owning one of the latter (and better for the environment on so many levels) than clutter from the former.
- Items that are well-made and taken care of help build your family’s history. When I set a table for tea, I can choose from the cups given to me of my great-aunt, my husband’s great-aunt, my husband’s grandmothers, and my grandmother. My children hear the stories of the women behind these cups. We eat off the plates chosen for our wedding. We only own six, but they add to the history of our family the well-set table represents. And when the heartbreaking day comes when my mother passes away, she will leave me items that will add to the table, tangible memories of her style and the many meals she prepared and served us over the years.
- Beautiful items can bless others. Do you ever host meals for those who do not sleep under your roof? Did you use paper plates and serve microwaved pizza? Hopefully, you didn’t. Now, don’t misunderstand me. I believe there is a place for casual dining. People need us to focus on them first and not the “doings” of entertaining. But it’s a fine line to walk as a hostess, and we so easily choose casualness over care. Laying a table of your best is an act of love and respect for your guests. When I’ve been invited somewhere and I walk in to a set table, it communicates to me preparation and welcome. Why not gather items of beauty for these opportunities?
- Beautiful items can bless YOU. How much emotional investment do you place on the kitchen item you picked up at your local Big Box store? Probably not a lot. And many items in our homes are used for utilitarian purposes. Why NOT pick-up the inexpensive option? But what if we took the time to learn what we love and use our purchasing choices to build an expression of our unique creativity; slowly gather the items for our homes that communicate beauty to us? This can be difficult to do with the options at Stuff-Mart. Thankfully, thrift stores and eBay allow some of us to make our choices at more reasonable prices. It takes more time often to find what you want, but how rewarding once you do! In other words, don’t always be blinded by the price of something so you ultimately reject its possible value. Ask questions, find out why something costs what it does, and be open to learning something new.
Are you inspired to gather items for a beautifully set table? Need more information? Here are a few books I recommend to add to your library for reference:
Bon Appetit!
March 4th, 2008
If you ever break bread with others outside of your immediate family, it is possible you have been offended by others’ table manners, or they have been offended by yours. In the age of eating in the car, while standing up, and on the couch one might argue table manners are obsolete. But this is far from the case. Do you think about your table manners when you eat with others? In restaurants, when we have to share close proximity with other tables, are we aware of how we act affecting those around us?
Let’s face it, eating with someone is an intimate act. And there’s ways to make the act more attractive and less attractive. Which category do you fall in?
Here’s a list of six bad manners that are incredibly common. Do you recognize yourself or your loved ones in this list?
- Drinking before finishing the bite in one’s mouth.
- Putting food in or taking the silverware out with the inside curve of the utensil instead of the outside curve (like the picture above).
- Placing personal items on the table such as keys, cell phone, or purse.
- Touching your head or face while eating.
- Talking about your food preferences (likes or dislikes) during the meal.
- Leaning on the table with your various body parts, including arms, elbows, or chest.
The majority of the above bad manners involve issues of hygiene. After all, imagine accepting the bread basket from the person who just ran their hand through their hair or itched their ear? And most likely, that purse set on the table was just on the car floor.
Other table manners involve how we appear to the ones having to watch us eat. When we wash our food down with our water or chew with our mouth open, it means we are oblivious to the person sitting across from us. Remember, the purpose of etiquette is for the respect of others, showing we are aware of those we are with over ourselves.
Most likely, I am preaching to my choir of regular readers here at Tea Party Girl and you could write this article! However, manners of all kinds are common Internet search terms, because many of us are still in the dark on these matters. The days of debutante training and finishing school are over, and more and more think good manners irrelevant for their circumstances. However, an amazing amount of socializing and business take place away from the home in our society around the table. For this reason alone, good manners are not for girls only!
For further encouragement or instruction on etiquette, especially for the children in your life, there are a number of valuable resources available including:
Tonight at dinner, be aware of the dynamics around your own table. Were you surprised?
February 20th, 2008
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, drop the hats and enter my contest (see below).
Afternoon tea does not need to be only for special occasions. You don’t always have to dress up. Yes, it’s more work than serving chips and soda, but with a little practice and some key items on hand, you can be prepared to serve afternoon tea easily and quickly, as I did this afternoon.
I assembled the above table in about twenty minutes. It’s important to note I have a designated corner of my home that is mostly clutter-free and ready to go. Do you have one? Here’s what I did in order:
- Preheated the oven and popped in some pre-made scones straight from the freezer.
- Filled my teakettle with filtered water and set it on high to boil.
- Chose the tea I wanted to serve (Mim Darjeeling) and filled my tea sac with it.
- Set the table with two teacups and spoons, tea plates, already ironed tea-sized cloth napkins, and a filled milk and sugar set. All these items live in my kitchen cupboards so I can easily grab them.
- I picked out my teapot. Since I wanted the matching warmer, I decided on the smaller pot and filled the red carafe you see in the picture with more brew. Since this was casual, I just refilled the teapot with the tea from the carafe when we ran out. Kept our brew nice and hot!
- I pulled the scones out of the oven, placed four on a salad-size plate, remembered I had a few pieces of toffee stashed away and added them, and cut up one beautiful in-season red pear. I quickly bathed the slices in a little lemon water so they wouldn’t turn brown and added the plate of goodies to the table.
That’s it!
What didn’t I do? There are two items I would have added if they were on hand. But they weren’t and I went without. Can anyone guess? Leave a comment below and tell us what you think. I’ll send some looseleaf tea out to the first two people who guess correctly. Let the picture help you figure out what two simple items I would have added to this simple assembly of a cream tea, based on what I’ve shared here at Tea Party Girl. Good luck!
For more information about serving afternoon tea quickly, be sure to see my article, How to Build Your Tea Party Pantry.
January 18th, 2008
So you’ve decided to host a tea for your next event. The menu’s chosen and the invitations sent. You purchased the tea and reviewed how to brew it. Your event is not a buffet, and each guest needs a place-setting. What do you need to know?
- Afternoon tea, by definition, is a light meal. Luncheon/salad plates are the best size to use.
- The teacup is placed to the right of the place setting.
- Turn the teacup handle OUT (pointing to the right of the cup) and the blade of the knife IN (toward the plate).
- Use only non-scented candles and lightly-perfumed flowers. Let the smells come from the food and tea.
- Try and find luncheon-sized (nine-inch square) instead of dinner-sized (twelve-inch square) napkins. Place them to the left of the plate or on the plate folded prettily or with a napkin ring.
- If you use regularly-sized butter knives, instead of smaller spreaders, knife rests
are lovely additions and almost necessary. Your guests will find it difficult to rest the larger knives on the smaller plates.
- Other normal place settings apply. Use only the necessary silverware. Forks on the left, knives and spoons on the right. Water glasses sit on the right above the knife.
- Place-cards are a lovely, helpful touch.
Setting the table is my favorite part of preparing for a tea-themed event. I love to see all the pretty elements come together. Have fun with it!
What one thing can you add to your home to help you set a pretty tea table?
September 14th, 2007
Before I share this week’s tip with you, I’d like to raise my teacup and say Thank You to all my recent visitors and comment-ers! My first ten days of blogging on WordPress has been wonderful thanks to all of you. I hope we continue to get to know each other over the virtual teapot as we meet tea party lovers all over the blog-o-sphere.
Tomorrow Pink-Dancer, my only daughter will turn six, and of course our celebration will include a tea party under the oaks in the backyard. There was a time when events such as these greatly stressed me out. One reason was perfectionism, but the other main reason was inexperience. The majority of the emotional effort of any tea or hospitali-tea event I supervised in the past went to making sure I had covered all the bases within budget. AND I did all this with little children in tow.
As I look back now, however, I realize this was just part of the learning curve. Just like everything else, learning to host a tea party or event takes resource, time, and experience AND gets easier as you go along.
Be prepared to gather items for tea parties a little at a time. If you see a teacup you like, especially in the thrift store-BUY IT. Before you know it, you’ll have enough and no, they don’t all have to match. If your grandmother or aunt wants to give you some fancy dinnerware~say YES unless you absolutely hate it. It’ll probably end up becoming just what you want later in life.
Tomorrow’s event will include real teacups for the boys and girls. They’ll fill them with milk, sugar, and tea and stir them with their little spoons. Maybe one will get broken. But it exposes them to the real-deal which is more important in the long run.
Over time, gather linens you love as well. We’ll use a real cloth tablecloth tomorrow, but paper napkins. This is because Pink Dancer still lights up at the paper goods display at the local grocery store, especially if there’s pink unicorns involved. But we compromise. I say yes to the paper napkins and heart-shaped paper plates, but no to the cheap, paper-crunchy table covering. The value of the beauty of a real table CLOTH far surpasses the little extra work involved.
I keep a plastic tote filled with everything I need for a quick tea party except the food and flowers. I kept a list of what I wanted in my wallet so I would remember and picked things up as I was able. Now it’s a breeze to easily host a tea event. Time and experience paid off.
So here’s my Simple Tea Tip in a nutshell: Start small, but start. Do not expect perfection. Go for it, even feel overwhelmed and tired afterwards but know this. It gets easier. Consider starting a tea tote. And the joy of taking tea with friends is worth the little extra work.
June 13th, 2007
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